yup its been a year... a whole year ... dad is gone i have to accept that... he is just not going to walk back in and make things easier again. I have to get over his death but everytime that I look at my daughter i see my dad... i see him in everything i do. its not fair, i should have never had to see both my parents gone before i turned 21... But im blessed beyond all words... i have a parent left, yup i got lucky and blessed i have three parents... even when i tried to push one of them away they stayed.
i am grateful for my husband who has stood by the tears the screams and even me telling him i didnt want to ever hold our daughter, boy am i glad i did!
what many of you dont know is that my father was suppose to be the first to hold Taylor Ann. My dad was my hero and I knew that I wanted him to be the first to have the blessing of holding Taylor... when that didnt happen and Taylor was born early, it took me a long time to allow anyone including family to hold her.
Dad was my hero.... now back to my title of this blog...
When my mother died at the age of ten dad promised me he would never leave me... NEVER.
I remember in this last year screaming and crying in anger that he PROMISED.
Nick reminded me though that he hasnt left me. He is looking out for me. and I believe it!
he held taylor first he was there when she was born and he will be there everyday for the rest of my life till we are reunited!
This week has been hard so far, but DAd i love you and miss you!
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